pizza is so tasty

Sitting here wondering why I eat so much.  A new pizza joint opened up and we just gorged.  Sitting here wondering if I stare at this needle will I go cross-eyed.  Sitting here with a wedding gift:  towels that I'm embroidering.  Wondering why I waited until the last minute.  Wondering if I will ever finish.  Wondering if a needle will break.  Going to Missouri this weekend for a wedding.  Reminds me of mine.  10 years ago.  Ten years we've been married.  Marriage is like a full time job.  I thought it was a partnership will you do things together, you problem solve together and life is full of happiness.  Good-night Irene!!!!  Its the hardest thing I have ever done.  Even if they are good men.  Even if they love you.  Even if you love them.  I just don't get it.  You suggest something and they yell and scream from the bathroom to the car to the event.  And lo and behold they have a good time.  And, God forbid you make a suggestion and they yell and scream from the bathroom to the car back to livingroom.  And, lo and behold 6weeks later they are doing what you asked.  I will never understand it.
                         Photos of wedding gifts tomorrow.

158 days : my feet hurt.

On my feet all day today.  Helping teachers, helping kids.  I love it when kids come to me and ask for a book that is only carried at the high school.  I love inter-library loan.  I love it when a child just loves a book so much they have to share it with their friends.  I'm glad they are reading but I get this secret thrill when I'm the one who purchased the books for them.  I am exhausted.  Hitting the couch. Watching worthless violence and empty sex.  "game of thrones"

                                                                    More SWAT Photos

Sent George to the vet with cat and dogs.  Time for new meds and vaccine.  tehehehe.  then i'm having him take me too dinner.  I am so glad we live in Texas.  I can go out to a fine restaurant in cut-offs and flippers.  Have a good weekend yo'all.

end of a very long week

I made it through another week.  159 days left and another round of bills to pay.  We have been punished again in North Texas.  It's so flippin hot again.  We had several cooler days and now it's  back up to the high 90's.  Looking forward to rain.  I was tricked into thinking I could start celebrating cooler days. 
Taking off my shoes, my clothes and laying on the couch like a vegetable for the next 3 hours.
  Did you know????   When you purchase an e-reader you need to ask questions.  1) when i purchase a book is it mine for life?  and the answer is always yes.  However do you know about licensing? 
Like my students write:                                   Well Let Me Tell You.....
Depending on your device, depending on the licensing agreement w/ the seller determines how long you get to keep the e-book.  Question:  if I lose the device is this book still mine?  Question:  how many devices may I have this book on at one time?  Question:  if I upgrade my device will I be able to upgrade this book to my new device? Question:  If you go out of business is the book still mine?  Will I be able to put it on more than one device?  Cool days always remind me of:

                                                                              

What happened to the cool days.  My oven hasn't been on since last May.  My tummy wants baked apples, baked chicken (not from deli) cheesy gooey caseroles etc etc.

                                                                  

SWAT that mosquito

Last night I spent with SWAT.  Not only are they good looking but they are kind and patient.  SWAT comes from every department in the Police Department.  What amazed me most was that the SWAT Unit travels with a doctor.  The Dr. trains with the Unit.  Part of their gear is a medical kit that will help them stay alive.  It is so sad that in the United States all Secondary Schools must have a full-time policeman.  I do not have to worry at night if I go for a walk, I do not have to worry about being mugged at the grocery store.  I do not have to fear a bomb going off in my back yard.  But, I do fear;  a gunman coming to school.  I am so grateful that these brave men and women are willing to risk their lives to me safe.  It is not the way we watch it on TV.  All officers have children and wives to go home to at the end of every shift.  I say a prayer every morning that me and my students be safe.  I thank God every day that I  became a teacher. I have had 30 wonderful years teaching children to read and to love animals.    I have only felt true fear once. but, more of that at a later time:    160 days and the  first 6 week grading period ends on Friday.  wooooo hooooo!!!

      Damn!   I wish I could show these photos to my students.   My "cool"  with the kids would really go up.

   

                              

                                             

                                               
                                            hummer saying good-bye :  heading to Baja   :
                                                              I'll join you in June

                                                            Little Boy turning red

I give you money and you tell me I can't pay you.

I just love our economy.  No wonder we are in this mess.  According to Obama if you gave me an additional $4,000 this month to pay bills:  I would be a good girl and  pay only my bills.  What is he nuts!!  I'd give George $500 and then make that down payment on a new car. And, put the rest in savings.  Just tried to pay a credit card.  We have a 5 day grace period.  Oops!  the grace period ends Friday.  I want to pay it on Weds.  Guess what they won't take my payment on Monday.  Went to the ER last Monday.  Made my medical deductible.  But they haven't filed to the insurance company.  Rehab can't bill me until ER files.  Gee!  I just want to pay my fair share to see the specialist.  Now these bills will rack up too.    Money makes me crazy!!!!  School makes me crazy.  I need to finish that crazy quilt before I retire.  Making it out of silks that I have been saving and buying on sale for years.  162 more days and I can be on permanent vacation.

                                                       a much simpler time

                                                           

a full belly makes one satisfied.

 Had lunch with George.  Some kind of strawberry balsamic dressing.  Wonder if I can find it on-line.  Nothing like an ice cold coke in my hand and a a full belly makes one feel so satisfied.  So, satisfied;  I put a t-shirt quilt together and discovered I was short 2.  hummmmm?  Should I let friend choose the last 2 t-shirts or should I just pick them from the bag.   What a conundrum.  Cut sew and finish.  Wait, wait,  wait.    Well after letting my tummy digest I decided to wait.  Took a class once and the teacher said she had several projects going at once.  Yup!  that's me.  I just never know what I feel like working on when I'm satisfied or frustrated.    Think I will spend the day binding.    163 days left.

punish me!

heard on the news an administrator has been put on administrative leave with pay.  What the hell am I doing wrong?  I get reprimanded.  I get chewed out.  I get humiliated after I have to endure biting my tongue when I would love to tell a parent you are your child's problem and not this school.  My lips go numb when I want to walk over to another adult and say stop acting like a three year old and have to suck my lips instead.  I finally realize I am the oldest in my building.  I finally realize I am the oddest in the building.   I finally realize that everyone I have become friends with has a cat I found on the street. It comes to my attention that my job is obsolete and I  have to get down on my knees that I have a job next year.  I  I can't sleep at nite because of the huge responsibility teachers get crushed with when children:  look at you :  and believe you when you tell them  " if you do what I ask every day math will be easy for you next year."   And I whine, and I complain and I get too involved with my kids.  I drive my boss crazy whining and complaining  and He still won't punish me.  What am I doing wrong? All I want is to be punished.  Punish me.  Let me stay home and get paid.  Let me sleep late and pay me my full salary and stay home.  13 weeks and we have winter break!

there is no justice in this life.

Fairness??  Ha!   My bones are good.  My nose should have broke.  All my bruises have gone away.   I stopped limping today but want to faint if I touch my knee or turn my hand wrong.   No evidence at all from the ER adventure.  Lots of drama at school again.  I wish a big film company would come and film us for a year like they do bears or whales.  What would they find?  I swear you have to be nuts to work in middle school.  Kids are just like quilters.  If you want them to do anything you must first get their attention.  Then you got to show them how to create that fancy stitch.  Then you have to get their attention again.  Me?  I'm the worst.  I do everything backwards.  Not only do I think backwards but I flip things upside down.  Teachers just love me in their classroom.  Left handed and a flipper. Thank goodness its Girls Nite Out.
 164 days and counting.
 If you like empty violence, wasted sex and a simple plot:  read or watch Game of Thrones.  The good guys die.  Wow!!  (based on book Fire and Ice)

it's just life getting in the way

Went to work today.  Can't believe I'm not sore enough to stay home.  I can't believe I have a guardian angel.  Nothing broken.  Nothing bruised.  Not even raccoon eyes.  The Doc at the ER didn't even look at my chart.  Got the shot to knock me out and let me sleep.  That must be why I have no bruising.  I'm still really sore. I'm just not sore enough to burn a sick day.  I need those sick days to take quilt classes.  The ER doctor  prescribed medication I'm allergic too.  How terrifying.  I always ask as I leave if the prescription has anything in it that I'm allergic to.  I was just too stoned to ask, but, I did ask if anyone wanted to go dancing w/ me.    2 choices with a bad prescription.    Go back to ER or see my primary care doctor.  Doctor it was.  3 of the meds I'm on are making me crazy.  Finally I have the answer.  But, they are the drugs of choice.  No one will take me off of them.  No one.  And, I'm scared to stop because breast cancer leads to bone cancer.  So, I must have a guardian angel. I went to the doctor and didn't try to self-medicate.
 There is a type of "rehab" now for patients who keep falling.  Geez!  what next? 
I hate it when you take a day off  from work and come back and  find people missing.  Nobody's talking.  Nobody knows what happened.  And, here I am wanting to know if we should send cards or flowers to these people.   I swear all this drama and rehab is just life.  Life.  I'm finally old enough to understand  Life will never be fair.  I can run and run and think like a 14 year old but  again life just happens to get in the way.

finally a true adventure on a work day

Yesterday was a truly long day.  The weather has broken and we are having beautiful nites.  When George and I came home last evening I grabbed the leashes and said lets go for a walk.  We only circle the block so that Maggie will not learn there are other blocks.  I don't want her to leave the neighborhood if she escapes. Our cat Cali is a roamer and wanderer.  She always goes on the walks with us.  She is so funny.  She walks along the gutter and runs from car to car.  We are starting our 4th year walking in only one direction.  To help get over my long day, I decided to have an adventure and go in the opposite direction.  My oh My!  The fireworks went off.  George complained and moaned.  He is one who hates change.  Maggie was upset that George and Max would go the other direction and Cali sat in the gutter between all of us.  The only one happy on the adventure was George Jr.  He had all kinds of different smells to discover.  We didn't go 4 houses. George Moping and Snarling.   Cali  Meowing.  and Maggie Hyperventilating.  Yup! I tripped over Maggie and went down nose first. I remember my nose slamming into the grass and dirt thinking I have to protect my shoulder, my ligaments and my knees.    With my nose in the dirt, I  had enough time to think that this adventure sucks and I want to go home.  My neighbor came running.  I remember saying :  I just want to lay here for a little while.  Needless to say:   My Left hand is bruised.  My right wrist looks funny and my knee is swollen.  My nose hurts and I am swollen under my left eye.  George said at least we got to meet our new neighbors.  12 x-rays later and nothing is broke.  I went to the ER for the shot in the butt.  Ummmmm I like those shots but, Lord! they burn going in.
                                                             More about this adventure tomorrow.

                                                         A perfect fur-person to flip over.

Long day and a very long nite.

Kids are so forgiving.  One of my oddest boys today asked about my weekend.  I started sweating around 8:00 today.  I said I was a little sad because a friend of mine had died.  He told me it was ok to be sad and to still try to have a good day. I wonder if all this sweating is stress related.  They were so quiet and good today.  They worked so flippin hard:  we were still working when the dismissal bell rang.
 32 years of teaching.  4 years retired.  her heart just stopped.  The worst part is she was younger than me.  I just can't put on a happy face tomorrow. She was my mentor, my first friend here and when it got chaotic she always listened and then we went out for dinner.  She went with me to Chemo when George was unable to.  Cut my hair when it first started growing back.  Hug your children tonite.  Call your parents.  Hug your husband and say a prayer that all will be well tomorrow.  One day you are alive and the next you may be dead.  One of her favorite sayings:  and this too shall pass.   Tonite when you close your eyes make sure your priorities are in the right order.  I have to hug George a lot tonite.  I miss her so much.  167 days and I can't tell her how sad I am.

37 more Saturdays. I never should have counted

Did very little this weekend.  (cleaned bathroom & laundry:  guess that will never go away)   Just wanted not to think about work.  Went to a yard sale.  Bought 5 tops  and 2 jackets for $2.50.  I had already planned not to buy any work clothes.  A friend called.  Met me for soda and took me to a yard sale.  Holy Moly:  two of the shirts were silk.  Whoever owned these had really good taste.  Spent the day pretending I was already retired and on an adventure waiting for these darn hummers all day.  Finished two quilts except for binding.  I remember learning about the north-south flyway.  Now I know what it meant.  Geese, Cardinals, Crows and Humming birds spending time in my neighborhood and heading south.

                                                  above     I  Machine embroidered.  My photo

                                                            class w/ Anne Kennedy.  Gracious Lady

                                                          hummers heading to Mexico

                                              Below:  Young male cardinel:  we have watched grow up

its been a hell of a day

The minute I get out of my car I have to put on a happy face.  A dear friend of mine has died.  That is one of the worst things about getting old.  Facing your mortality.  We drive too fast,  hurry not to be late,  spread our selves too thin.  We text so we won't have to spend time talking to a family member and we take chances when we drive.  We eat unhealthy food & get heart problems from stress.  She was younger than me and her heart just quit.  We spend so much time being angry, hurt or just "stressed" and compartmentalize our lives instead of rejoicing how fortunate and privileged we are.  When you finally reach this age nothing is more important than time.  I have had a great life.  I was immortal in my twenties and thirties.  When I was 45 people thought I was 28.  I never told.  I have taught all over the world and crossed the Atlantic and Pacific a dozen or more times.  And, yet I ache.  I hope and pray that when I get old I don't look back on my life and regret not doing, regret being hurtful, regret......my life.  We only have one chance.  God please make it so that my life is right.  I am so tired.  I want to quilt and grieve.  Quilting is always such therapy.

i hate being the oldest

I am actually 3 months older than my boss.  A new teacher that was hired is 3 years older than me but it's his second career.  It's a huge responsibility to give advice.  I give it and they listen or don't listen.  All I can do is bite my lips.  Its so hard getting old.  My calves hurt.  My feet hurt.  My shoulder hurts and my eyelashes even hurt.  I hate this medicine.  I couldn't even subtract numbers correctly today.   Children are so forgiving.  They watch me have a meltdown and whisper to me I made a mistake.  I wouldn't change my job for all the money in the world. Well maybe all the money would be tempting.  Young teachers need to get a handle on their classes the first 2 weeks of school.  If you don't those kids will eat your lunch.  Its about routines and expectations.  If they start driving you crazy:  stop.  reteach the routine.  Then, if that doesn't work call the parents.  Call on the good kids too.  If you can take away the audience of the kid that is driving you crazy:  it's easy to breeze into spring.

                                                  wish I was here.   169 days and still counting

a higher power

I have never lived anywhere that has had better sunsets than AZ.  Let me refresh your memory:  sunrise and sunsets are created by dust in the air.  Arizona has lots of dust.  Now that North Texas is in stage 3 going to stage 4 water restrictions Texas is as dusty as AZ.  I must say there is something about leaving home at dark.  The sunrise this morning was equal to an AZ sunset.  Oranges, Purples and Incredible soft bright light breaking the skies.  It truly makes you believe that there is some higher power making the skies, earth and the wild turkeys I have to avoid each morning. 
                                                   
                                           An Arizona Sunset:   What the North Texas sky looked like


                                                        

Never tell your boss.............

I don't have time to spit at work!  OMG   During the last month of school last year, I plopped myself down in my boss's office and told him I didn't know what to do with myself.  Kids no longer could checkout and I had to wait for teachers to turn in equipment.  Inventory was done and stupidly I confessed  again to him that I still had nothing to do.  Never let your boss watch you put together a jigsaw puzzle that takes 6 weeks for a special volunteer at work.  The kids gave up on it:  it was so flipping hard it took forever to finish.  I have mentors to match schedules with, I have fixed assetts I can't get too.  I have to create work for my math students who need catch up and I have to call parents.  What happened to my library job?  It's a perfect library after redoing the whole darn thing.  It took six years and now I can't enjoy it.  I can teach anything.  I can teach quilting to boys, girls and adults.  But do I have time?  I can't wait to start teaching quilting to my kids.  But, I can't seem to find an afternoon to meet the kids. (hope I have boys again)  If I don't get time to spit or talk to one of my student aides I'm gonna explode.  I'm too old for this!  I need a life.  Somebody have a whiskey and water for me.   171 days 4 hours and 17 min.

Consistency!!

We hear be consistent, be consistent.  It is so flippin hard because what is fair for one student is unfair for another.  We either have a rule or we don't.  And, then that special kid who tugs your heart....comes along and you have to look the other way.  Math teachers please:  Times tables, times tables.  teach these kids how to multiply.      Left the quilt I've been working on for 6months on the ironing board yesterday.   And now it has cat hair and paw prints.  Consistency.  Consistency.  I forgot to put it away last nite...........maybe i will just quilt the fur too. 
                                                          My photos                                         

                                                 Mothers trying to be consistent.

Teachers, Quilters and Seniors the tarnished years: Special Treat

Teachers, Quilters and Seniors the tarnished years: Special Treat: Just got out of my jammies and am ready to spend the day quilting.  Spent the morning watching a DVD on mixed media quilting.  I get my DVD&...

Special Treat

Just got out of my jammies and am ready to spend the day quilting.  Spent the morning watching a DVD on mixed media quilting.  I get my DVD's from Quilting Arts TV when they go on sale.  Looked at Quilt University and Craftsy.com.   Quilt University you only get to keep it for 6 wks and then it disappears.  I wonder if George can find a way to burn the lessons for me.   A lot of these national trainers teach in Houston.   However I must say:  laying on a couch, with a comfy pillow and cat purring sure beats having to put shoes on and taking a class with 19 other personalities.  Next I will watch it in my sewing room and create the project with the instructor, but, no shoes.  174 days and still counting

14 year olds.

I'm getting too old for this job.  It is not the children!  its the adults, the paper work, the technology, and the drama that's driving me crazy.  I tried to google why I am crazy but never got an answer.  Middle School ?  I have spent almost my entire adult life thinking like a 14 year old.  It's going to be unnerving to think like an adult.  Wow!! to purchase adult clothes.  How scary.  I haven't read an adult book in 5 years.  Have you ever joined a book club?  I have joined 2.  I have been fortunate to have joined a group of people from all walks of life, all kinds of jobs and all kinds of education. It's interesting how each of us come away from a book differently when you have had different life experiences.  When you read...you bring your own personal baggage to a book.  One of my little girls discovered "Cinder" last year by  Meyer. She loved it so much she brought in her personal copy and begged me to read it.  I am not a sci-fi fan but it is a truly wonderful modern fairy tale.  Its a fairy tale w/ emperors, cyborgs and space ships.   I'm 1/2 way through "Scarlet" book 2 to find out what happened to Cinder, the handsome emperor and the Lunar Queen.  The book Cinder has stayed with me for so long  that I have created my own theory about our crisis to the environment.  I truly believe that we came from Mars.  We became a superior species and destroyed Mars.  Somehow when we landed on earth we created the dinosaurs and destroyed them too.  Just look at Mars.  Humans destroyed that planet.  Took all the minerals and water from the moon and ended up settling on earth.  And, now we are destroying earth.  It just amazes me that I have internalized this over the years and now believe I am right.  Your great grandchildren will study this theory someday in school.  Can't wait until I make my art quilt where George hangs a moon.     I met Ms. Meyer at a conference and she is just darling.
                                                                   174 days left and George hangs a moon                                     
                                                                

A skunk : part 2

George scrubbed and scrubbed where the skunk sprayed.  My eyes are not burning like last night.  He just forgot to scrub and scrub the door frame.  Once you smell skunk ;You will be pleased to know, its a smell you will never forget.  We haven't had rain in 20 days.  Hit 100 degrees again.  This heat will end soon.  The nites are in the low 70s.  Its nice enough to walk at nite.  Days are getting shorter quickly now.  Had to leave before sunrise.  Everyone was lethargic. Everyone wanted to go home.  I get to stay home in 175 days
                                                    Someone please take me on an adventure!!  Please oh Please

                                                my photos.   Soon to be 150 days left to count

We had a very special visitor last night!!!

Tonight I wish I was obsolete.  A skunk came by to visit.  She left her scent right by the door of my sewing room.   Lizzie needs a bath.  I can't wait.  George has always washed the pets.  tehehehe!!    I remember the last time the dogs said hello to a skunk.  He came home, eyes watering,  I wouldn't let George or the dogs past  inside our door.  I sent him  straight to store to get tomato juice (for you young ones that all we had until the new vet formula).  I felt sorry for that cashier.  No one came near him.  I made him drop his clothes at the door.  Washed them twice and they were still odor-ifferous.  I'm laughing so hard now...just remembering.  I really wanted to help him.  I did I did.  It was so sad (so sad......hehehehehehe).  He had to bring in the other dog and wash him next.  I do remember.  I did help.  I held the door open.  But, I do have a special way to wash cats.  George will be successful tonite.  He just put out a sugar cream cookie candle waiting for Liz to come back inside.    Picture this:  I just picked-up Lizzie and sniffed her all over.  Its not her.  darn.  I just sniffed Lyle all over.  Its not the dogs.  My eyes are burning.  Its by the door.  At least no one got sprayed last night.  I really, really  wanted pictures of George and Lizzie all wet.

 

Max and Maggie:  Living room window watching world go by

                                                        George Jr.

i'm an obsolete dinosaur. 176 days.

Oh!  it's hot here in North Texas.  I'm sitting here eating out of the ice cream container enjoying every morsel.  Bowl? ha.   It's a good thing I'm retiring.  Showed my students how to access 221 e books for free today.   GEEZ!!!  Now they don't even need me to find books.  I put them on my library homepage so I could make myself obsolete even fasster.   I'm a dinosaur because I hate charging my cell phone. It's so annoying.  I hate new computers.  I hate updating because my boss keeps updating his email.  But, I ain't no dinosaur when it comes to quilting.  I love art quilts.  I love dyeing my own fabric and I love teaching quilting. I sponsor quilt club after school.  176  school days and I can begin teaching adults how to quilt and make art quilts.  I read about medical insurance last night and how it changes when I retire.  I can truly say I'm a dinosaur.  When did the insurance companies get so powerful that they can deny a surgery, a drug or test that my physician has ordered.  It says it in the first paragraph:  even if your doctor orders it, and "they" the frickin insurance co. deems its not needed  or too expensive I have to pay for it.  Then why the hell do I see a doctor, to help me stay alive and have a quality of life?  I might as well call the insurance company and make an appointment for them to do surgery since they have all my money.  What has happened to this country?  Those last 6 words mean I'm a dinosaur.  It's time to be humble.  I'm just too old. 
Why can't I pay insurance only when I need it????????? ummmmm.
                                                                 Art  Quilts I have made

p.s. And, the Smoke came home to visit last night.  Hope she comes back home to stay. Loosing Annie was hard.  But, it was the right decision.

What a sad, sad state of affairs. I'm making myself obsolete. 177days and counting.

I am guilty.  I can't imagine a school, a town or a city without a library.  I can't imagine walking to my bookcase grabbing a book I bought a year ago and taking it with me to the doctor's office, an airport or a car repair shop.  But, I'm guilty.  I still buy books.  Unless you have opened a shipment of brand new books you can only guess the smell; but it's wonderful.  There is nothing like the touch, the feel, the smell or the artwork of a brand new book.  I'm guilty.  The last time I went into a library was to check-out audio books for my car to drive to El Paso.  Most people can do it in 7-8 hours.  I take 9-10.  It is the ugliest, driest, flatest, nastiest ride in Texas.  As long as I can evolve into 3-4 murders the ride is not painful.  All weekend I spent ripping stitches for Susan.  Didn't like the color.  And I listened to talking books on my computer.  Yep! checked-out from my library.  The library has just upgraded and now have two companies you can check-out from.  And, I did it.  I down-loaded a quilt book.  Guilty as sin!!!  We Americans are so spoiled and so lucky.  In America we grow-up reading for enjoyment.  When I taught overseas libraries were for study.  Books were the price of shoes.  Not for us.  A book still costs the same as a burger and fries.  We were raised with books.  The rule at our Book Mobile was you could have as many books as you could carry up or down the stairs.  What an idea!  A mobile library, A school library for entertainment.  Now I know why I am a 1/2 time librarian and 1/2 time math teacher.  I'm  almost obsolete.  What a sad sad state of affairs if we lose our libraries and librarians.   Without books our children will only know what their 3rd grade teacher taught them.  Without books our children will only have the imagination of what they learn at home or at school.  If you were taught about Lincoln and not Jefferson or Washington you will never know these things.  You will not be looking at books to spark your interest.  You will only look at where google takes you.  I am guilty too.  I too will become totally obsolete like vhs video.  177 days to retirement.
                

the quilt above shows a life with no worries, no cares. no taxes, no work, no dishes, no mopping, no cat boxes to clean.  "Chipmunk Spring".